hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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