You really coming over, don't trick.
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Pants are for mortals
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Randomize
