whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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