My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Randomize
