So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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