She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Randomize
