We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
