just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
he had hair everywhere except his balls
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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