ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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