i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
My liver just had a heart attack.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
