um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
