i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Randomize
