I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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