they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
