I'm eating all of the evidence.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
