hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
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