Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
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