I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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