haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
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