I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Randomize