I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
