would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
My feet surprised me
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
