I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize
