The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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