What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
i've created a new STD.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize