This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Randomize
