its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I just googled if crying burns calories
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
