She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
