I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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