Where did you get a picture of my penis
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
