I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
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