Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
