I'll bet she douches with gravy.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Randomize
