Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Randomize
