i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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