You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Randomize
