The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
