I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
