I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize