That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Drunk is not a location!
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
