Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
