Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
