What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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