Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Welp...herpes.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Randomize
