As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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