BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
