The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
