He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize