Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize