Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Randomize
